Dear Agile Metaprogrammer
I read and enjoy your weblog. You are fairly witty and your stories about attending Woodstock-like love-in
s are always amusing. And although I have no intention of even trying Ruby
, Haskell, Lua, or whatever else you are fawning over
at the moment, there are some snippets of interesting technical knowledge to be gleaned from your experiences.
For example, just the other week I realized that with fewer than 500 lines of intricate code and a few pages of boilerplate interfaces (I was going to have to define all those Java types and methods anyway, so it's free, right?), I could use an InvocationHandler
to remove some duplication from my code. I would never have thought of that if I hadn't read about how Ruby lets you make delegates with one line of code.Philip
would be proud of me. But let's get to why I'm writing, ok?Your posts are getting tiresome
.Blah, blah, blah the indexing takes about 20 lines of code and took less than 10 minutes to get working
. Blah, blah, blah magic models
. Blah, blah, blah rewrite reddit in Lisp in one hundred lines and twenty minutes
. Worst of all, blah, blah, blah
. That's real money!
I don't mind fanboys, luser
s that brag about these 'metaprogramming' languages but never actually do any work with them.
But how irritating to hear yet another Rubyist, Pythonista, or Lisper brag about getting actual work done in half the time, with half the effort, then taking the rest of the day off to enjoy the Real World
Some of us are busy doing Enterprise
work, you know, and we're man enough to put in seventy hour weeks debugging our XML parsers, Front Controllers
, and verbosely typed languages (VTL
s). We don't want to hear about your Euro-style three hour lunch breaks and incremental delivery schedules.
We do the heavy lifting and we have the GANTT charts to prove it
So just cut it out, ok?
p.s. I'm sorry I'm so testy, but I've been up all night trying to talk to our QA team located in Bangalore. It's bad enough that I don't speak any of their five mother tongues, but it looks like their QA plan is based on a different version of the specs than we got in our supposedly locked down briefing package from the consultants that were hired to gather requirements.
p.p.s. And another thing, you Software As A Service gadfly...
Labels: agile, popular